Today the universe sent me a former confidant and partner in crime. I've been feeling more and more adrift in the question of "what next" lately. and truth be told, had asked the night sky on more than one occasion for some sort of nudge to know which direction to go in. The universe is a cagey beast, though. Instead of directions, it sent me the Accompanist, a blast from my high school past and current (musical) director.
Yesterday, he called out of the blue saying he happened to be in the state, and did I have tomorrow afternoon free. (yeah!) He who has seen me through my most neurotic and most exuberant. He who stood beside me during what I thought then was the most stressful thing I could ever attempt: music competition (ok, in actuality, he was sitting, and a bit behind and the to side. irrelevant. as he's more musician than I'll ever be, there was a certain comfort in knowing he wouldn't falter, and I could key off of him if I did. together, we won me more than my fair share of shiny gold medals, both in locally and at state.) Also, he who lives many states away and with whom I correspond with somewhat sporadically.
Back in the day, we had many an intense conversation about life the universe and everything over hot cocoa and the occasional wine cooler (hey! it was the 80s! wine coolers were SO cool, no matter what you say...). then I moved. and he moved. and life got busy.
As a lover of the metaphor, there seemed to be something poetic about being able to reconnect and share some of the recent questions ("what's it all for?! what should i be doing?! and where should i be doing it?!") with someone who directs for a living. Ok, fine, he directs music. and people! and a program!
isn't music life? and couldn't someone who always had your musical back potentially symbolize everyone who has your spiritual/emotional back?
So while it was fantastically great (and calming) to be gifted a perfect afternoon with an old friend, it feels like there's more to it than that. There's a part of me not willing to underestimate how superb it is to feel firsthand that it's all about the people. Some are in your life for a time and then for whatever reason, not. Others, no matter how much time and space moves you (or them), they are there for good. Now that. THAT, is comforting. ...especially since i'm toying with the idea of quite physically moving myself away from some pretty amazing people who I quite intend on having in my life for all time. (i'm looking at you big ten. and you roommate 1.0.)